And the beat goes on......

Back in March of 2013 I went for my annual PAP because I was getting married and wanted to renew my prescription for birth control and that was about the only way to get it. So off I went, no big deal really. I've been seeing my PCP (who can do PAPs) since before I had boobs and she is a sweetheart. She was excited for my upcoming nuptials and to hear all about Adam, and I was only to happy to gush about him.

Well, a week or so after that I got a call from her to discuss the lab results. That was odd to me because in the past I've always just gotten a call from the nurse telling me all was well. Well, this time it wasn't. My lab results came back showing low grade dysplasia. What is dysplasia you ask? The definition Google returned to me was "The enlargement of an organ or tissue by the proliferation of cells of an abnormal type, as a developmental disorder or an early stage in the development of cancer." Sounds scary, right? Well it is!

I had to follow up with an actual GYN and had a colposcopy done. Ready for another wonderful Google definition? "Colposcopy is a medical diagnostic procedure to examine an illuminated, magnified view of the cervix and the tissues of the vagina and vulva. Many premalignant lesions and malignant lesions in these areas have discernible characteristics which can be detected through the examination." Basically you get up on the table, put your feet in stirrups, and then the doctor swabs the cervix and then looks at it with binoculars. If he sees something funky he takes this tool that looks kind of like toe nail clippers with a really long handle and snips at the funk so it can go to the lab.  This was done two weeks prior to our wedding. I prayed hard between the extreme uterine cramping that it would all just be a nightmare and all would come back okay. Well, it didn't. 

I had HPV. 

This can be sexually transmitted or something that just occurs on its own. My sister now freaked out goes for her annual, and she goes through all the same stuff. We get hooked up at my bridal shower with my cousin on my Dad's side- and she's gone through it too. One day a conversation with my grandmother reveals that she had cervical cancer in her 40s or 50s. 

So, the doctor suggests playing the waiting game. Often times the body will clear up the virus on its own and there is not need for further treatment. Come back in six months and do another pap. 

I got married and settled into being a wife, a student, and employee, a daughter, and a sister. I didn't think about it much and before I knew it my six months were upon me. That PAP came back funky too. So another lovely colposcopy. I got a call from his medical assistant on a Thursday asking me to come into the office on Monday to discuss the results. I asked if we could do it by phone then and there but the doctor was in surgery. Crap was hitting the fan at my job and I couldn't take the time off from work without feeling like I was jeopardizing my job. She couldn't tell me anything about the results because the doctor hadn't told her it was okay to do so. 

Well, I went home that night and I was a zombie. Did I have cancer? Would I be able to have children? Adam and I had been talking about starting our family a lot lately. We want children. I told Adam and it was a terrible night. We fought so badly and a plate got broken, and I ended up on the floor crying uncontrollably. I needed him to be there for me and he was being a jerk. Well, upon him seeing me reduced to hysterical tears he held me and apologized and shared with me how scared he was too. We cried together.

I knew we couldn't wait through the weekend without the results, so I called the doctors office Friday morning and demanded someone get on the phone with me and tell me what MY medical records held. A nurse got on the phone with me and all she could tell me was that it WAS NOT cancer. Okay! PHEW! I was prepared for it to come back as pre-cancerous, I knew this was a possibility. No big, we'll freeze the shit and get on with life.

This one came back as high grade dysplasia. The doctor didn't think it was a good idea to play the waiting game anymore, and he didn't feel as though the freezing treatment was the best option either. We skipped all that and went right in for a LEEP. Ready for more Google??? "Similar to conization but performed in the office. The piece of the cervix is removed with a wire loop." 

I was knocked out for this one, thank god. 

All went well. The pathology on it came back fine, in fact it showed low grade dysplasia, not high grade. Which means my body was probably on the road to clearing it up. They are so confident they got all the ick and that things will be fine from here on out that typically they have you come in after for another PAP 3-4 months after the procedure, they told me I didn't have to come back for it for 4-6 months. 

I will be going for the 3-4 months though. Adam and I want to have a baby. (Alyse, you're the only real life person who reads this- keep your mouth shut lol)

The reason I'm sharing all of this is that if my sharing it gets ONE woman to go out and get checked- it's worth it. 

Now, for me, I don't believe this was anything that happened to my because of having sex. The research that I've done suggests it can come from many different things. Given my family history of my gma having cervical cancer, my cousin and my sister all being hit with the same thing- it seems like it could be more genetic. I could be wrong. Also, a compromised immune system can bring it on as well. The list of vitamins that you can be deficient in being contributors is nuts-o. Guess who hasn't taken her post bariatric surgery vitamins in about a year? This girl!

Well, no more. Amazon delivered to my door my vitamins yesterday. I took them this morning (and I'm remembering why I stopped taking them, I feel like crap for a little while after) and I'm going to be taking them everyday. They sit in the kitchen on top of the coffee canister so I can't even have my morning cup of joe without being reminded to take them. Also, these vitamins have been approved by my OB/GYN as more that sufficient for the folic acid needs of getting and being pregnant. 

So, two more weeks of no sex- and then it's baby making time! (Hopefully!)