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Friday, September 21, 2012

Changes


The photo of me in the pink shirt was taken during my July 2011 vacation. The photo of me in the dress was taken August 2012. In the photo on the left I weight 310lbs and the photo on the right I weigh 196lbs. (I've since dropped an additional 2lbs.)

How can anyone say that weight loss surgery isn't good? Look at my arms even! Sure, I still have about 40 pounds to lose to be where I want, but all things considered I'd say that isn't even bad for saggy skin. I loved the picture from vacation and for awhile it was even my profile picture on Facebook. Now when I look at it I truly feel like vomiting. 

I showed this before/after to my future mother-in-law who was absolutely amazed at the difference. She asked me how I felt looking at the before photo and I really had to stop and think because I feel such a whirlwind of emotions. I love that girl on the left and I'm still her! Sure, I'm smaller by 116lbs but everything that made girl on left who she REALLY was still exists in girl on right. And then I start over thinking things. 

Adam loves me, of that I have no doubt. He loves my personality, he likes my family (gasp!), he enjoys my sense of humor, puts up with me bossing him around in his own home, scarfs down my cooking, and isn't afraid to be affectionate in public. Now, all these qualities he is so in love with exist in girl on left too, but I know girl on left would never have caught his attention. I know I can't/shouldn't think this way- but it just sort of creeps in. Oh well, I guess it's just one more thing to be thankful about with this surgery because I can't imagine my life without him. I had a dream awhile back where he got hurt and was pretty much at deaths door and waking up from it was such a relief. Then I realized how much it hurt in the dream would be nothing compared to how it would be in real life. 

I've said it to my friends and I'll say it here. Ending up with Adam makes going through every bad ex worth it. Every time I was cheated on or referred to as a moped (fun to ride but don't let you friends see you with), is worth it if I get to keep him. 

(September 17th Mets game)

Work is a nightmare. Someone who I have literally defended and who's job I KNOW I have saved on several occasions is black balling me. When this person was hired the owner of the company called me her manager and put me in charge. Since then my department has been absorbed into another department and I'm no longer management (a very welcomed change by me!! I promise) but she is complaining about EVERY little thing I do. I wish for one weekend she could answer all the calls I take, the insurance verifications I do from my cell phone, or just anything I really do. Please people- just because you don't know what someone is working on doesn't mean that the person isn't working. She has no idea how many times a day I get pulled to a problem with the sales reps and how many other little tasks I preform to make her job easier. Nope- we'll just complain and back stab. I hate my job. 

Which brings me to the topic of school!!

Last year I ordered a university hoodie from my college. I ordered a men's XXL in white and ended up returning it because it was too small. Well, this year here I am in a women's XL. This semester is already kicking my ass and it's only the second week. I'm taking this stupid Natural Hazards class for a science credit and I have to do several labs a week using Google Earth and I want to shoot myself in the foot. I should have taken understanding DNA. Oh well, too late now!

Well, that should be a good update for you guys. Touches on a bit of all areas of my life. 


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