Tick tock...

My birthday is in four days, I will be twenty-seven. Every year at my birthday I start reflecting on my life in the past and what I want it to be in the future. This year especially I am thinking about the future, with my VSG scheduled to be done December 8, 2011. This time next year I should literally be a whole new person.

That's forty-two days away. When I first started the countdown app on my cell phone it was sixty-eight. My oh my how time is flying.

I met the nutritionist for the second time yesterday. I'm down eight and a half pounds. That is enough weight loss to shrink my liver and to satisfy the surgeon. Obviously, I would love to lose more then that. After all, isn't the entire purpose of this process to lose weight? The tricky part for me is going to be not regaining any of it. But, then again, isn't that always the problem?

My cousins bypass surgery is scheduled for the same way, and if all goes well we should be sharing a room in the hospital. My mother is also planning to be there, which surprises the hell out of me. I truly don't believe my mother has left the house since my car accident on November 14, 2009. I will be impressed and very touched.

That being said I'm also so worried her being at the hospital will just be annoying. She is so dependent on others and my sister will already have her hands full. At first I really wanted my aunt to be there because next to my mother, she is the closest thing I have to that role. However, there is some family stuff going on right now and I don't know if I still feel that way. I want my mom there to stroke my hair or make the nurses tow the line if needed. Instead, she'll just need to be pushed around in a wheelchair that will probably resemble a stretcher. *sigh*

Deep down, I can't help but hope that her watching me go through this process will jump start her brain and make her want to change. Supposedly she has a doctor appointment in two days, but who knows if she will follow through with it. Like I said, it's been almost two years since she has left the house.

If anyone is reading this, please pray for my mother, maybe with more prayers something will change?